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Grey Sparrow Journal and Press, as of January 31, 2018 will move to

Issue 30, July 31, 2017
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by Christina Wheeler

I know there is no use crying over spilt juice, but I was upset when I woke up and saw that it was raining cats and mice outside. People say they like the rain, but I bet not one of ’em knows what it’s like to work in the rain. If they just walked a kilometer in my shoes, maybe they’d understand. I was pretty bummed about the downpour, but they say chuckles are the best treatment, so as I munched on my cereal, I flipped to the comics section. Unfortunately, nothing could get a laugh out of me.


That is, until I got to the construction site. Someone new was working—a woman. Boss introduced me to her and told me to assist her. I couldn’t help laughing. Of course she needed assistance—she was a woman, for shouting out loud! It made her mad, I could tell.


“Don’t worry, my bark is worse than my might,” I said.


Now she was laughing—Boss was, too—and I thought, wow, that was easy.


“My bark is worse than my bite,” Boss said.


When I realized my mistake, I brushed it off: “The devil is in the particulars.”


Another round of laughter. “Details,” the woman said. “It’s details.”


I couldn’t believe it. They were making a fool out of me, when we should be making a fool out of her.


I lunged at my boss, shouting, “You’re red meat!”